Chapter 11

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Marriage Prep Resources for Parish Leaders

Following the worldwide Synod on the Family in 2016, our own diocese called its own synod, Embracing the Joy of Love. The recommendations from the Synod’s Taskforce on Marriage Prep Best Practices  foreshadowed the movement of the Church as a whole towards a more catechumenal model of marriage formation. Our diocesan marriage prep guidelines largely reflect its proposals. Please see below for some resources/suggestions for building the marriage catechumenate in your parish!

Marriage Prep Ministry Resources

  • FOCCUS is the recommended pre-marriage inventory in our diocese. To learn more about the FOCCUS pre-marriage inventory, please visit the FOCCUS website.
    • Click here for more information on becoming a FOCCUS facilitator. You can also reach out to the Office for Family Life and Spirituality for assistance in helping your parish get set up to offer the FOCCUS inventory.
  • Witness to Love is a virtues-based, catechumenate model of marriage renewal and preparation that integrates modern principles of psychology and the virtues to help couples facilitate an authentic dialogue about their relationship. It is built upon the foundation of helping engaged couples to discern their choice of a mentor couple/Marriage Godparents that can act as a lifeline and help couples invest themselves more fully in parish life. We highly recommend it as a foundation for building a parish-based marriage catechumenate.
  • Online marriage preparation programs can be a great option for supplementing in-person programming, however they should not be seen as an alternative to in-person programming except for couples for whom attending in-person is impossible (ie. military or immigration reasons). Our recommended online option is Witness to Love’s Be More Retreat.
  • Our diocesan marriage preparation guidelines pertain to all couples preparing for marriage in the Church, including couples already been civilly married or living in common law marriages. The benefit of meeting initially with their marriage formation minister is that adaptations can be made at the outset in response to any particular circumstances. For example, both FOCCUS and Witness to Love have adapted materials for civilly married couples. Some parishes may have their own marriage prep retreats for civilly married couples, often in coordination with the O.C.I.A. process.
  • One of the proposals of the Synod was to “welcome and accompany engaged and newly-married couples into full participation of church life.” As such, we strongly encourage engaged couples to prepare for marriage at their home parish. If couples are reaching out to schedule their wedding at your parish but reside elsewhere, please remind them of the need to connect asap with their home parish to begin marriage preparation!
  • A Rite of Entry can mark the beginning of the Marriage Catechumenate, giving engaged couples the chance to publicly declare their intention to commit to this journey of marriage formation. It also becomes an opportunity for the parish community to commit to praying for the couple. Here is a Rite of Entry sample. Feel free to download and adapt.
  • Click here for our updated diocesan marriage prep guidelines.
  • Click here for pdf’s of canonical documents associated with marriage prep.
  • Click here to download our Journey of Your Love marriage prep brochure.

Important Church Documents on Marriage Prep

  • Catechumenal Pathways for Married Life provides pastoral guidelines for dioceses and parishes in strengthening preparation for the Sacrament of Marriage. Originally published in May 2023 by the Dicastery for Laity, Family, and Life, with an introduction by Pope Francis. Available here as a free download and can also be purchased through Our Sunday Visitor.
  • Amoris Laetitia is the post-synodal apostolic exhortation by Pope Francis addressing the pastoral care of families published in 2016.
  • Familiaris Consortio is an apostolic exhortation by St. Pope John Paul II on the role of the Christian family in the modern world.

Contact Information

Staff

  • Director: John Prust
  • Associate Director: Janelle Peregoy
  • Associate Director: Wendy Baez
  • Administrative Assistant: Angie Rosario

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About the Coat of Arms

Bishop Pulido’s coat of arms is divided into four quarters with wavy horizontal lines from top to bottom. The blue and white lines represent the Blessed Virgin Mary. They also suggest water, which alludes to Jesus washing the feet of His disciples and to the waters of baptism. The red and gold lines represent the Holy Spirit and fire. The colors also can be seen as referring to the Blood that (along with water) poured from Jesus’ side at His crucifixion, as well as to the bread (gold) and wine (red) transformed into the Eucharist. At the center is a roundel featuring a symbolic representation of the “mandatum” (washing of the feet), which he believes exemplifies service to all humanity. The roundel’s outer edge is a line composed of small humps; it is borrowed from the coat of arms of the Diocese of Yakima, where Bishop Pulido served as a priest before being named a bishop.

About the Coat of Arms

Bishop Pham’s coat of arms combines the Diocese of San Diego’s coat of arms on the left side, and his on the right. On his, a red boat on a blue ocean sits on diagonal lines suggesting a fisherman’s net. This symbolizes his ministry as a “fisher of men,” as well as how his own father had been a fisherman. The boat is also a symbol of the Church, which is referred to as the “barque of Peter.” At the center of the sail is a red beehive (a symbol of the bishop’s baptismal patron saint, St. John Chrysostom, known as a “honey-tongued” preacher). The beehive is surrounded by two green palm branches (an ancient symbol of martyrdom; the bishop’s ancestors were among Vietnam’s first martyrs). The eight red tongues of fire around the boat are a symbol of the Holy Spirit and a representation of the diversity of ethnic communities.

About the Coat of Arms

The coat of arms combines symbols that reflect Bishop Bejarano’s spiritual life and priestly ministry. The main part of the shield shows four wavy vertical lines on a gold background. These represent flowing waters. This alludes to his chosen motto and also symbolizes the graces that come from the Divine life to quench our thirst for God. The upper third of the shield is red because it is borrowed from the coat of arms of the Order of Mercy, of which the Bishop’s patron saint, Raymond Nonnatus, was a member. The central symbol resembles a monstrance because St. Raymond is often depicted holding one. The Eucharist is Bishop Bejarano’s inspiration for his vocation. It was through the Eucharist that he received his call to the priesthood at age seven and which keeps his faith and his ministry going. It represents the call to offer oneself as a living sacrifice. The monstrance is flanked on either side by an image of the Sacred Heart, alluding to the mercy of God and echoing the idea of a sacrificial offering of oneself united to the sacrifice of Christ, and of a rose for Our Lady. It is an allusion to Our Lady of Guadalupe, patroness of the Americas, and highlights the bishop’s Hispanic heritage.

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