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Resources for Adult Children of Divorce

Who exactly are Adult Children of Divorce? As the name implies, these are adults whose parents divorced during their childhood. For some children of divorce, the effects of their parents’ relationships may not be intimately felt until adulthood. Some adult children of divorce may often feel alone and lost in a Church and in a society that promotes an idealized nuclear family. Some may struggle with trust, avoid conflict or fear commitment. Adult children of divorce are statistically more likely to divorce themselves and may struggle to form healthy attachments in relationships. All these dynamics are normal and expected in adult children of divorce. However, the past does not determine the present.

 

As Christians, we are always people of hope…let us acknowledge adult children of divorce and help them find pathways of healing and love. This page is intended to provide resources for this journey.

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Resources

A red heart with a yellow path and a cross at the top, adjacent to the text "Life-Giving Wounds" in gradient shades of red and orange.

Life-Giving Wounds

Life-Giving Wounds is a Catholic ministry to young adults and adults with divorced or separated parents. We provide three-day healing retreats, ongoing support groups, and online resources to help men and women turn the wounds and pain caused by the dissolution of their parents’ relationship into life-giving resources of faith, hope, love, and joy. You can connect with the ministry and directors Dr. Daniel and Bethany Meola by email info@lifegivingwounds.com, e-newsletter, or our Facebook page.

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Upcoming Retreat

Mar 28 – 30, 2025

Life-Giving Wounds Retreat

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Meet Dan and Bethany Meola and learn more about their commitment to serve adult children of divorce.

Our Associate Director, Janelle Peregoy was invited by Anne DeSantis, Director of the St. Raymond Nonnatus Foundation, to collaborate on a podcast. Through sharing our stories of hope and healing from our parents’ divorce, we hope to shed a light on why we need to continue to have these conversations and support all family members effected by divorce.

Podcast/Blog

When parents separate or divorce, it’s painful and traumatic. And most teens and young adults feel alone and uncertain of how to deal with it all. Restored offers them the practical advice and tools they need to cope, heal, and grow, so they can feel whole again and thrive in life.

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Books

Book cover featuring a person in a red sweater on the right side, with the title "The Children of Divorce" and subtitle beneath it on a black background. Author's name, Andrew Root, is displayed along the bottom.

The Children of Divorce: The Loss of Family as the Loss of Being

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The cover of the book "The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce" features a cream background with maroon text. It includes the subtitle "The 25 Year Landmark Study" and the authors' names: Judith S. Wallerstein, Julia M. Lewis, and Sandra Blakeslee.

The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce: The 25 Year Landmark Study

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A person holds a torn drawing of a stick figure family. The tear separates one adult and a child from another adult. The book's title is "Torn Asunder: Children, the Myth of the Good Divorce, and the Recovery of Origins."

Torn Asunder: Children, the Myth of the Good Divorce, and the Recovery of Origins

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A painting of Jesus with a crown of thorns and wounds on the head, set against a starry background. The text on the image reads "Life-Giving Wounds: A Catholic Guide to Healing for Adult Children of Divorce or Separation" by Dr. Daniel and Bethany Meola.

Life-Giving Wounds: A Catholic Guide to Healing for Adult Children of Divorce or Separation

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Articles

A person with a thoughtful expression rests their chin on their hand, looking through partially open wooden blinds.

Your Parents Just Divorced – Now What?

By Janelle Peregoy

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A bouquet of white calla lilies with green leaves is placed on a tiled floor, surrounded by broken glass shards.

If You Grew Up with Divorce, You May Still Need Healing

By Dr. Daniel, Bethany Meola

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Two children sit on a couch, looking serious. A person stands in the foreground with their arms crossed, partially visible. The children wear colorful clothing, and the background is softly blurred.

How to Heal from Parental Divorce

By Janelle Peregoy

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A person's hands are gently holding gold rings, with a soft focus background displaying blurred colorful lights.

How Catholic marriage prep is better serving adults from divorced families

By Janelle Peregoy

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Catholic Diocese of San Diego

About the Coat of Arms

Bishop Pulido’s coat of arms is divided into four quarters with wavy horizontal lines from top to bottom. The blue and white lines represent the Blessed Virgin Mary. They also suggest water, which alludes to Jesus washing the feet of His disciples and to the waters of baptism. The red and gold lines represent the Holy Spirit and fire. The colors also can be seen as referring to the Blood that (along with water) poured from Jesus’ side at His crucifixion, as well as to the bread (gold) and wine (red) transformed into the Eucharist. At the center is a roundel featuring a symbolic representation of the “mandatum” (washing of the feet), which he believes exemplifies service to all humanity. The roundel’s outer edge is a line composed of small humps; it is borrowed from the coat of arms of the Diocese of Yakima, where Bishop Pulido served as a priest before being named a bishop.

About the Coat of Arms

Bishop Pham’s coat of arms depicts a red boat on a blue ocean, which is crisscrossed by diagonal lines suggesting a fisherman’s net. This symbolizes his ministry as a “fisher of men,” as well as how his own father had been a fisherman. The boat is also a symbol of the Church, which is often referred to as the “barque of Peter.” At the center of the sail is a red beehive (a symbol of the bishop’s baptismal patron saint, St. John Chrysostom, who was known as a “honey-tongued” preacher). The beehive is surrounded by two green palm branches (an ancient symbol of martyrdom; the bishop’s ancestors were among Vietnam’s first martyrs). The eight red tongues of fire around the boat are a symbol of the Holy Spirit and a representation of the diversity of ethnic and cultural communities. The red of the boat, the beehive and the tongues of fire allude to the blood of the martyrs.

About the Coat of Arms

The coat of arms combines symbols that reflect Bishop Bejarano’s spiritual life and priestly ministry. The main part of the shield shows four wavy vertical lines on a gold background. These represent flowing waters. This alludes to his chosen motto and also symbolizes the graces that come from the Divine life to quench our thirst for God. The upper third of the shield is red because it is borrowed from the coat of arms of the Order of Mercy, of which the Bishop’s patron saint, Raymond Nonnatus, was a member. The central symbol resembles a monstrance because St. Raymond is often depicted holding one. The Eucharist is Bishop Bejarano’s inspiration for his vocation. It was through the Eucharist that he received his call to the priesthood at age seven and which keeps his faith and his ministry going. It represents the call to offer oneself as a living sacrifice. The monstrance is flanked on either side by an image of the Sacred Heart, alluding to the mercy of God and echoing the idea of a sacrificial offering of oneself united to the sacrifice of Christ, and of a rose for Our Lady. It is an allusion to Our Lady of Guadalupe, patroness of the Americas, and highlights the bishop’s Hispanic heritage.

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